So, first, my weekend. It sucked :( I had no money so on Friday I went out and sold my DVDs and PS2 games for which I got $6.75 but it was raining a lot and they were heavy and I need to get rid of stuff so I took it. I had about $12 total at this point. Saturday my friend sv came over and we got some verde and hung out and then I was going to nap and go to a show that I have been excited to go to for a while. Oh, I didn't mention, my allergies were really bad so I was taking mass benadryl and cough syrup which makes me delusional and sleepy. I layed down at 8pm and awoke at 2am, missing the show and throwing off my "schedule". Sunday I kept it really mellow by choice but should've done homework but felt like ass. Monday I was also unmotivated to do homework, I think because it was about observations and I was thinking of too much stuff.
I found out that I got the nanny job so that was good news :) rb contacted me by email to see if I wanted to go on photowalk bc the weather was nice, but I declined to do homework, now I haven't seen him in over a week and haven't heard from him since that email to which I responded and he didnt' reply, I am trying not to overthink, I know he said he had a lot of work and a pushy, needy client he was working with. Group was good, we took a self assessment about the learnings we've been doing in the beginning 1/2 hour and I have "basic assertiveness skills" which is one better than "does not even have basic" which is what I expected, but some of the questions were "Do you feel pressured to buy things when a salesperson..." but I have no money so usually, no, but I do stay and talk to them so I guess I could just say "No thank you, I am not interested" and walk away. We all had equal share time, I kept my phone out as a clock bc there isn't one in the room even though we have talked about not using our phones, I made an announcement but still txts and calls come through on silent so this week I am bringing a watch.
Tuesday I started to get my act together (again)! I did all my homework and got great scores but late penalties, I could have them waived bc of disability services but I don't want to abuse it and this time I wasn't really having an episode, it was poor choices on my fault. I should pull a B in this class and it's only 2 credits so my GPA should stay okay, although I want to bump it up as high as I can bc I know I can.
Then at night I went dancing / to see music with sv. This was good but kind of annoying bc I met her at yoga at 8:15 and doors are 9, no music til 9:45, so we decided in the future we will meet there bc this is the 2nd time we tried and we were just waiting around a lot. We had a fun time, I didn't have *anything* to drink which is the first time in like forever in a bar with cash on me ($9 but still) that I didn't drink :) People were really freaking annoying, particularly this one table of pretty people wearing PBR trucker hats and way to fancy girls and drinking PBR that kept getting more and more loud as the night went on. I don't understand when people go to see live music and talk the whole time, there are tons of bars with stereos and people not performing or listening, major pet peeve of mine!
We also went to the market across the street to get caffeine drinks bc bars are expensive, go us! She was also really worried about getting home, the bus that goes right to her place only runs til like 10:30pm so I got her alternate directions. At first I felt annoyed because I forget that I am so logical that directions make sense to me but then she said "I've just never gone this way and am bad with directions" so I wrote it down, walked her to the stop and reminded her to ask the bus drivers. When we were at the club she wanted to ask somebody something but I got all weird and then I told her about social anxiety and she said "well you hide it really well", more so that I'm heavily medicated for it and I've been working hard and overall it's first few times meeting people or unknown situations, I am fine once comfortable.
Yesterday was my first day as a mama's helper, the mom and son are awesome, we all get along really well. One time L cried when she went to do laundry but not even a minute and he really seemed to open up to me by the end of the day, like he was reaching for me to hold him, then they gave me a ride home bc it was raining :) and she might have a bike for me for $30 (same as skye who wants to get rid of hers) or less as she said she had been trying to give it away. I'm gonna ask her to look at it tomorrow, the only thing is it's a men's mountain bike so it might be too tall, she has mentioned height many times, not me being short, but them being tall ;) I might have to change him on the floor at first bc he moves a lot on the changing table which is higher up than comfortable for me but she even suggested it and said she was fine if gradual redressing happened bc it was rough even with mama showing me the ropes. She is really showing me how she does things which I like and told me to modify as needed. I go back tomorrow :)
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